-B-

remember the little kitten I was talking about that stan gave me?

well, it died. diedi yesterday morning, Friday morning.

On Wednesday, when I was out jogging, and when i checked my phone, i had 7 missed calls from my dad. Then he called again, and he told me that Kitty (the kitten’s name) had a bad fall and was badly injured. I was like how on earth did that happen? he said, that Kitty jumped onto the table, but tried hard to grasp on, and it was hanging there, trying to get onto the table, but it lost it’s grip and fell. That, my cousin saw. She called my dad and they found Kitty near the bed, bleeding from the mouth, and some other liquid also coming out, I’m guessing foam. So he took it and put it on the bed, and it was lying down but wiggling very distortedly. I msged Edel and asked her whether can save or not, she said probably not, cos it’s so young..

I was like, oh no.. he asked to get back asap, which i didn’t =( came back much later, and Stan and I saw Kitty, omg. it was really bad. It was breathing so hard, couldn’t open the mouth, so it was breathing from the nose only. I carried it, but it couldn’t stand at all. it fell limp. and it’s lyingdown position was so distorted. Cats never sit like that with the limbs all over the place! That’s how it was. =( it’s head was moving from side to side, it was in so much pain. Then Stan checked the backbone, and said probably some broken bone there.. it didn’t wanna eat or drink anything.. poor thing.

so I just covered it up and put it on the bed upstairs.

The next morning, i sent my dad n bro to school, then Stan and I took it to the vet. I had to, if I didn’t, it wouldn’t live past a few more hours. So we took it and the vet checked it, said no broken bones or fractures, but it had a spinal injury. And once the doc put it on drips and fed it some milk, it was sitting up, but not still. It was rocking from side to side.. so poor thing la.. The doc said, it can either live or die, but they wouldn’t know, so the kitten was admitted for a day.. When the doc said nothing broken and all, and when we saw the kitty in a better condition, we were hopeful that it would live..

And then, Friday morn, the clinic calls and tells me that the kitten died. I was like oh my god.. and for a moment I was just sad.. but then i was normal again. And then Stan and I went to the vet to collect the kitten’s body back. I buried it in my garden. Its eyes were still open, and very distant. Poor fella. So i buried it la. Then a few hours later, only it sank in that it was gone. It was such a cute cute kitten. Always jumping here and there, following me everywhere. It was very attached to me, and it was so daring. Never knew what danger was, and the other danger being my cat. But i was kinda puzzled, as to why it tried to jump up onto the table. It NEVER jumps up, for as long as i had it i knew that for sure. but that night it did. And whenever it jumps from the table to the floor, it would be ok and all. weird stuff. hmmm..

well, now i have Kiki to look after.. cos i’m afraid it might be pregnant! but i’m still not sure at all. maybe it’s just growing fat, but it’s been behaving weirdly. hmmm… well well, well.

well, i also said my work supervisor’s nice. well, she is, but she also gets on my nerves already. She’s suppose to only ask me to help when i’m working, not at other times other than my working hours. but that’s not what she does. which is annoying. grrrrrr.

ok la, bye!

hooohooo!

stan’s gonna be playing in the 1st selangor team in the super league!i mean, if the coach called him up to tell him he’s in, sure they’d want him to play right? i hope he’ll be in the 1st eleven. he was so excited just now telling me. i’m so excited for him too! =) he was so happy and just like gonna jump out of his skin. hehee. yay!

oh, and when he called, he was telling me about some kitten that he found along the road, which almost got hit. so he went to save it and when he picked it up, he said it was too cute so he brought along with him. and he was talking to me on the way back,and he was telling me that the kitten was sitting in between the gear and the radio, and all that. so cute.. then he came over and brought the kitten and aiyoo, it was sooooooooooooooooo adorable! it’s fur color, brown, black and white was really nice. is really nice, i mean =p it was so small. it’s a little bigger than my hand. hehe..

but unfortunately, i doubt i can keep it. cos, KIKI is soooooo jealous. and doesn’t wanna have anything to do with it. we were experimenting la, more like observing the two. stan held the kitten and i kept an eye on kiki. it gave a cold stare la, and the poor kitten doesn’t even know anything, still a baby what. and Kiki, slowly crep near and gave that snarl, and the low growl and was just waiting to leap onto the kitten. scary wei. but we kept it apart.

Kiki owns this house and all the occupants what. hehe, this is its territory. so the kitten makes it feel threathened. poor kitty. so right now, they’re in two separate corners of my house. have no idea whether they can get along at all. Kiki is like so big, and the kitten is so tiny. and it’s sleeping now on my bed =) and it weighs like a piece of paper. so cute.

well, my first week wearing specs. hehe, it makes me a little dizzy at times, but getting used to it la. still kinda shy about it! but shall get used to it. i think i look like a grandma. hehe. i dunno, lots of contradicting comments =p whatever lah, its still specs, and i don’t have a choice but to wear it. contacts is gonna cost a bomb for me right now. =)

my work supervisor in coll is so nice! she gave me a tupperware with a nice box with it. probably giving away stock or what, but still? nice right. i hope it’s a better place to work at =)

anyway..i also forgot what to blog about.. was on the phone for almost an hour and everything left my brains since then. hehe

goodnight!

hello hello… it’s 2.17 am, and i’m still awake. i should be asleep. if not i won’t be able to concentrate in class tmw morn. i mean later in te morn. aww, my little kiki is yearning and pining for some, a LOT of attention and pampering. hehe. until it started to rub against my face la.

every cat i had was different. lucy, sandy, zack. the three before Kiki came. but i missed the way sandy and zack responded. somehow, they two were more responsive. whenever i called to them from anywhere in the house, they’d come running! kiki is a very vocal cat, and it meows like a baby =) it’s also smarter than the other cats i had so far, in that, it knows how to escape from danger and find its way back. so far la, it has lasted longer than my other cats. hehe. my dad treats this cat like his own baby =) guess who gave me kiki? stanley! hehe. but when he comes around, he tortures the poor thing. hehe. but my cat is very friendly.. i think it doesnt really like to be carried, but it LOVES attention. hehe. don’t all cats do? i was just telling yogee, or was it ranjeetha yesterday, that if i had a dog, i’d name it Milo. it’s a cute name =)

i have officially started wearing my 2 extra eyes. hehe, i’m suppose to wear it all the time la =( but so far i don’t, cos my eyes are still adapting to it, cos straightaway i’m wearing high-powered lenses. so it makes me a little dizzy so i gotta take it off once in a while. i feel like a nerd now! my dad said i look intellectual. heheh, does he mean i wasn’t before this?!?! kidding! =p and he says i look like my mom! hmmm.. i look like.. i also dunnolah.. hehe. not so bad i guess. well, i don’t have a choice, since i never took care of my eyes till it got this bad. hmmm…

this week started off kinda lazily. coll, coll, coll.. i’m trying not to spend in college. gosh, if i did spend, i’ll probably be spending an average of 8 bucks a day, including transport. times 4, 32 bucks per week. i can’t afford that man! so i take bread to school. like a small girl. hehe. i dunno since when i started eating wholemeal bread. it’s good actually, never really favored it before, but i don’t mind now =) gosh, over the weekend i ate like a serious pig you know. i guess it’s cos the entire last week i didn’t really eat all that much. trying to save and stinge, and i managed to throw 20bucks into the bank. haha, start slowly la huh. =) gotta start scholarship work soon too.. this sem, gotta manage it really well, last sem was like hell man. i’m working in student affairs this time, i hope it’s not as boring as my previous place!

pirates of the carribean 3 is coming out next week! i can’t wait to watch it. stan always imitates and “insults” johnny depp la, cos of his acting, especially in pirates. hehe. for fun la. he’s probably just jealous that when it comes to johnny depp, i pay more attention to him than to stan. LOL. but he doesn’t deny the fact that johnny depp’s a superb actor. ahahah. would be watching it with him!. and he said he’d rather watch it with me for one reason, so that he can tease and disturb me to the max, and see me get all defensive and irritated and mad. hehe. he likes to see me get prickly, dunno why. cute it seems. weird human being. lol. shrek 3 also is coming out! and stan calls him the handsome frog. by god, shrek isn’t even half worthy to be handsome! hehehe. but well, i like the puss in booots. aww and his goo goo eyes. =) very manly and cute at the same time!

gosh, yesterday (monday), i went to pick my dad up from his school. and i got shocked to see so many fallen trees around that area. and then my dad told me there was a small hurricane, lasted around 3/4 minutes around that area too. the high-jump mattress in his compoun flew to the back of the school, the canteen counters also flew off dunno where and the school flag ended up on a car! the winds were damn strong.. and the fallen trees were huge! just fell across the road.. lucky it wasn’t raining when i went. scary man. oh ya, then he said in SS2, the pasar malam stalls also flew off. i was like, my God. how on earth? it would be spooky to have such things here. i mean, in other countries, things like this are quite normal and frequent, but for us here, it’s new and spells disaster. for all you know, we’ll get tornados and earthquakes here too someday, which i dread, and hope will never come! hmmm..and sometimes, it’s so freaking hot, and the next minute, it’s raining madness. on monday, i went home by bus and train and all, i reached home, soaked wet and soaked to the bones. i happily just walked in the rain la. i mean, no umbrella and no nothing for shelter, so no harm just walkin in the rain, only worried my book would get wet, but i stuffed it into my bag, so it was safe. i enjoyed it, the rain and the walk in the rain.. and unfortunately, i had to receive so many hoots and honks from all those idiots in their vehicles, uncivilised and downright sick. what thrill do they get from seeing me looking like that? my clothes weren’t transparent AT ALL, and neither was there any flesh showing. some people are just plain sick. i should be able to diagnose it later on. haha.

i wish i could go to U.S. too! my uncle invited me to got with him to U.K. next month for like 10 days or so.. i’d love to.. but it’s always the money problem. i don’t wanna burden my parents or what, so that i could go have a holiday. and at that time i’d probably be having midterm and whatever else. better not risk it also, catching up and all that. i believe that someday, i’ll be able to fly abroad somewhere =) with nothing to worry about. hehe.

i was watching mr bean’s holiday just now. gosh, it’s funny and stupid at the same time! i mean, it’s also so sick and just dumb la, ridiculous and everything, yet it was nice to watch. hehe.. he’s like so talented in making a fool of himself, and he earns pots for all that. amazing isn’t it? people and their talents. it’s really cool to be paid big time for something as talented as that, even sports or whatever. and especially when it’s something you love to do, and it’s not a 9-to-5 job. and you still meet a lot of people, get to travel everywhere, get privileges and all that. it’s all worthwhile. =)

i have 8 mins more, and i gotta get off. i feel like drinking the whole bottle of omum water, cos i’m having indigestion. my dad says its cos i don’t exercise. soon i will be doing it! when i go jogging while stan goes training =) or when i get home, turn on some music and dance for a solid 2 hours or a little less. or when i just spend about half an hour doing some stomach curls and all. hoohoo.

i went to IKEA again last saturday with stan to look for some things. and at IKANO, they were having display of beds and mattresses la. the last time we went also we check out the beds and all. hehe, beds. yeah, but we didn’t like sit on it or what, cos usually we’d get chased off. but this time when we went, we saw other ppl sitting on the beds la. so i excitedly went to my favourite bed on display. OMG, it was so awesome to sit on it you know. it’s like so so so so so so comfortable. and stan said, probably if we got married or what, and we had that bed, i’ll never wake up before 10am everyday. haha. true, it’s like so nice to sleep on. like a sponge. and then the color was even nicer. it was like a velvet darkish brown+dark grey. i have no idea what color is that, but that is it. it was nice. the pillows and bolsters were awesome too. and then stan said, that if he proposed, he wouldn’t gimme a ring, and then when i asked where’s the ring, he’d present to me an awesome bed, in place of a ring! heheh.. what a creative thought! but now i know la, i wouldn’t see a ring when i get a proposal from him. hehe. whatever la, not important now also!! but the bed idea? was cool. you know how much that bed costs? RM40,000! and it’s so simple. must be the quality, and endorsed for back posture treatment or something. hehe. awesome!!

anyway, i gotta get to bed now la.. toodles.

hahaha first of all…. i passed Marketing!!!!!!!!!! hoooooohooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
do you know how damn hard it is to pass that stupid subject?? it’s called Fundamentals of Marketing. i failed it in my first semester, and i just passed it!!!! it’s such a relief, to know that i don’t have to resit this subject if i failed it. hehe. i’m happy la. i called stan to tell him and he was sleeping, and he said well done, in such an annoyed way!! hehe, of course la, i disturbed his sleep. poor thing. but i’m just happy!! can go to sleeep smiling =) weeee…

second of all…. please welcome me to the 4-mata gang!!! *applause*.. haha thank you thank you. i’m being so ridiculous, can you believe it? well, yeah, i’m gonna wear specs..which is weird.. hmmm.. today i went to make the order.. and my mom was like so worried whether i could drive by myself until she made stanley call me also la [cos she was giving tuition to his niece at his place}.. she prob thinks i’m blind!!!well, she’s treating me like i’m blind. hahaaa

well hopefully, i’ll be less of a blind mouse, and my headaches will lessen too.

i’m so sick of coll. i really have no urge and no nothing to go back to coll at all. i hope it’s not gonna be like that the whole sem, if not i’ll be suffering all by myself! cos of my own doing.. hehe.. i’ve got about 10 mins more to blog.. told pedram to chase me off to bed if i don’t go myself.

guess what?? stan might play for selangor 1st team in the malaysia cup!! woohoo!! =) =) i’m so happy for him. i think he’s excited about it too.. but it’s just rumours.. dunno confirmed or not. cool laaa!!!! =)

anyway.. i’m gonna go.. bubbbbye!

you know, sometimes i wish i had a best friend. well, i don’t have one. used to have one.. actually 2 back then. one in high school which ended in high school.. and another one in church which ended in church 2 yrs ago. but that’s about it.

you know we see movies and read books and all that, and they have friends, best friends from small till they grow up, get married and grow old. but ever since i ended those two close friendships, i’ve never had any more best friends. and i don’t even know if i’d get one anytime.

i dunno, i feel like i just built this barrier around me, that i wouldn’t get too close to anybody. i have a bunch of close friends..[which i miss so much right now!! cos i'm so bored, can't wait to see you guys =)] but there isn’t anyone that i’m very, very close with. sometimes i wonder, is it because i’m afraid to get too close to anyone? well, the closest person who knows everything and all is stanley.. but he’s my boyfriend. not my best friend. and sometimes, i long to have one, cos you know, it’s just nice to know there’s this one definite person there always.

[my cat, kiki just walked across the laptop, this is what she typed: jkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkksw]

i have a few circles of friends. in college got a few, in church and my ex-classmates and my close friends. in coll, i’m either seen alone, which is most of the time, or i’ll be hopping from one group to another. and i see my friends all, they’re stuck to each other like glue, they’re so close, do this and that and everything together. and when i think of that, i realise that i miss out a lot on all that! but not when i get together with you girls..[which is not so often these days =(]

and then, you know when we all finished our studies, graduate and move on. i wonder if we’ll still be stuck together like now. a lot of things have happened, a lot of us have changed and a lot of other things have come into our lives to replace all those things that are gone now. and i hope between us, things won’t change… =)

i had this opinion that, when friends are too close, too stuck to each other in that circle of friends, they just tend to do everything together, think the same things, talk the same things, have the same opinions and tend to just stick to themselves, run back to the group, and difficult to break away.. i always took a stand, to always make new friends, don’t stick to one person all the time and all. that’s what my dad taught me. he told me, it’s good to have close friends, but always look beyond the circle. look out, always be ready to make new friends and don’t stick to one another, depend on that one friendship. it’s true in a way. and sometimes, when i notice that in the circle of friends i happen to be in at that moment, it makes me think twice of whether to go along with it. it’s good, and sometimes, it’s not all that good either. it can make you a little narrow minded after all. but maybe because of this belief of mine, that i hardly stick to a group. and i tend to do a lot of things on my own without anyone. is that good? yeah it’s good, cos i can get things done faster sometimes, or situations will just be made a whole lot easier without too many brains or hands. hehehe

but that’s not to say that i don’t stick around with my close friends. i do, but i dunno, you tell me, i seem to be like the independent one in the group. probably that’s why i always ask sab and yogee..”any stories from PJ?” hehehe.. they all live close by.. i live in timbuktu.

and probably that’s why i always feel like i have nothing to do and no one to go out with!! and then i drag poor stanley.. hahaha.. poor stan.

but whatever it is.. friends are important. i mean, i don’t wanna grow up and grow old without one close friend at least! i have jumped from many friendships to many more.. and this is what i learnt.. also, from observing others’ experiences.. that sometimes, if you give your heart away too much to a friend, you never know, that friend might just turn out to be not the one you envisioned to be. for e.g. my sister has gone thru many friendships which have ended and started, ended and started, and she’s gone thru many heartaches cos of that too. and maybe i’m just afraid of letting that happen to me. i mean as far as i know, it hasn’t happened all that much to me. and if it did, it wasn’t so heartbreaking. it was bearable. i could get over it like it never happened. does that make me feelingless? and insensitive to what is to come?

well, i feel like i’m belting out a whole load of crap. gosh, i sound so sentimental. hahahaha

well, to my girls [you know who you are =)], you’re still my closest friends which i intend to keep for as long as life goes on. and i hope you guys feel that way too! you guys are fun, caring and always there to brighten up the day. and i hope we do get to meet more often laa!!! =) hugs hugs hugs to you!

well well well, there ends my sappy story of friends. don’t feel offended anyone, because it was never my intention to offend anyone. =)

i’m quite the bored at home, but i don’t know what made me wanna blog instead! lol

can you believe it, i think for the first time in my life i read everything in the star newspapers..[excluding the business part and classifieds, cos it doesnt exactly apply to me... YET]

i read it back to front. and i realised, that when i read it back to front, it actually made me wanna read till the end [actually the beginning]!! so i guess, i shall read the papers back to front from now on =D one accomplishment for the day.

kiki [my cat] is sitting smack on top of my bro’s workbooks. hahahaha.

i still want my ice-cream!! yday, my mom decided to have a BBQ la in the hse. for fun, since it was a holiday. and guess what? instead of BBQing the chicken, we ended up baking it!!! hahaha…. cos we just failed to light the fire la. gosh!! trying so hard and pathetically. well whatever, but the chicken turned out nice anyway.. in the oven!

[can you believe it, my cousin, 8 yr old fart, is doing a barbershop session on my cat la... aiseh]

anyway, continuing, so everyone came la, only my family la.. stanley also came after that, after everyone had eaten and gone!!! muahaha… well, he came and i dumped all the chicken on his plate and all la, so he was eating and my sister was there too, we were chatting and all la.. then they finished and stan and i were just talking. he was crazy. behaving like a real crazy weird human being. that’s my new name for him. WEIRD HUMAN BEING. hehehe. and then we were looking at the movie screenings in the papers. we’re gonna watch Spiderman 3!!!!! weeeee! and i tell you, the amount of fuss i made and he made ah.. hehe. can you imagine, he wants me to wake up and go for a 11 am movie!! i mean i find it crazy.. get out of bed and go straight to a movie.. i mean if i did that at home it’s different. so we decided we’ll go ronda ronda in ikea.. hehe. always wanted to go there with him to ronda ronda. so yeah, that’s the new plan!

anyway, why am i telling all this? i also dunno. i’m just bored to my bones.

and now my cousins are ‘punking’ the cat’s fur up. oh my good Lord.

coll is gonna start next weeek!! results should be coming out soon.. i hope i don’t fail marketing la.. i hate marketing. everyone probably already knows that. hehehe

guess what? the other day, i went with stan to the optician, he had to get his specs. and i checked my eyes cos stan asked to. and the optician herself got kinda shocked. she said my long- and short-sightedness was perfectly fine, but my astigmatism is really really bad. and she said is it’s like 200 it’s already very bad.. mine’s 400 plus. hmmm.. and that means my night vision is really bad. i don’t deny that. i drive at night with much difficulty. so now i’ve to go to the eye specialist for a better more precise diagnosis and if it’s still the same, i’ll have to wear specs!! with special lenses for astig. ooooh my, hmmmmm. hmmmm,……. i’m gonna be blind!

i haven’t had new clothes in so many many months la. i just can’t be bothered to buy any, but sometimes i want something new in my closet!! i can even gladly tell that in every week i wear one same top that i wore the week before. or 2 or 3 tops. and it’s me and my jeans only. pathetic clothes. hahaha. well, i can live with that. as long as i have something to wear =) then why am i mentioning it?? hmmm

in today’s malay mail, there was a news coverage on the accident of a 3 girls, they all died, and the bday girl’s boyfriend survived. the picture of the car wreck was horrendous. it was totally smashed to bits and smashed.. no words to describe it la. it was awful. can you imagine at what speed the guy must have been driving?? along the federal highway, near the shah alam toll. only the guy is alive to tell the story, and he’s in bad shape. and if he doesn’t live??

it’s already May!! gonna be half a year already. how times flies and flies. hmmmm…i’m just rambling away my thoughts.. hahaha.